1. The odds that a fan trolls Tom Brady by tossing a "slightly deflated football" on the field . . . 19-to-1. There are better odds that a fan tosses a flare on the field (15-to-1) . . . and much longer odds that a SEX TOY is tossed on the field (45-to-1). The sex toy DID happen early in the season. Remember that?
2. Falcons coach Dan Quinn is bald, and the odds that he wears a HAIR-PIECE during the game are 50-to-1. Damn it would be funny if he saw this and DID wear one!
3. The odds of announcer Joe Buck being clean shaven for the Super Bowl broadcast . . . 10-to-1. Buck does have a penchant for rocking the stubble.
4. The odds the word 'DeflateGate' is NOT mentioned during the whole game by Buck, his partner Troy Aikman, OR the sideline reporters . . . 8-to-1. That would be A MIRACLE. Especially if Brady and the Pats win.
5. Odds there is a halftime show wardrobe malfunction . . . 2-to-1. The odds are really short on this one. So, they must be defining 'wardrobe malfunction' broadly.
6. The odds Lady Gaga wears an outfit that Fox needs to blur for indecency . . . 3-to-2.
7. The odds someone catches on fire during the halftime show . . . 25-to-1.
8. The odds someone falls off the stage during the halftime show . . . 12-to-1.
9. The over-under on commercials that parody Donald Trump . . . 1.5.
10. The odds Patriots coach Bill Belichick hosts "Saturday Night Live" in the weeks following the Super Bowl . . . 5,000-to-1. That would be the DRIEST monologue ever!